The Small Plates - A Mather Family History: Cheryl and Dave

While pondering and planning for this family newsletter, I have had the best of intentions with thoughts of a literary masterpiece. Yet the end result is an apt representation of my family’s current state. Time is marching on at an unprecedented pace and dates, deadlines and milestones occur without pause.

I have hit a bit of a midlife crisis as I find myself transitioning from a mother of little children to a mother of teen, preteen and elementary age people. I was good at parenting preschoolers and babies. I excelled at playdoh, crafts, trips to the museums, playdates at the park, storytime at the library & themed birthday parties. Injuries, both physical and emotional, were soothed easily with a kiss and distraction. The validation of motherhood was immediate and constant as my children were quick with hugs and obvious adoration for me.

I struggle to find my groove as the parent of these older, strong-willed individuals. It is almost like I am continually coming to know each of my kids again for the first time. All of my insecurities from my teen years come rushing back as I re-navigate the waters of junior high and high school; this time as a parent who must stand at the pool’s edge and gauge when rescue is necessary, and when it is important to allow my children to learn to tread water. Agency becomes less of a concept and more of an hourly experience for parents and children.

In Ether 27:27 we are promised, “And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them”. My personal learning curve has been steep. Yet I have seen the power of forgiveness, humility and prayer as I have come to the Lord and plead for guidance and strength. God’s grace has been evident as the windows of heaven have been opened and He has refined me and made me stronger.

What a blessing to be a parent. Being a mother demands my best and requires me to stretch and grow in ways that are often uncomfortable and occasionally downright painful. But I have also experienced exponentially more moments of pure joy. I am learning that humor is vital and can diffuse a volatile situation. I have learned to respect my children and appreciate them as incredible, intelligent, evolving individuals. The phrase “don’t sweat the small stuff” has become a mantra that I apply to them and, more often, myself. In attempting to view my children through the Lord’s eyes, I have come to also see myself differently; with a little more kindness and acceptance.

With this glimpse into my evolution of self, I hope I convey to each of you that God is good. My love for him and testimony of the Atonement of Jesus Christ has grown as I have allowed His grace to strengthen and lift me. I am so grateful for the knowledge of who we are and who we can ultimately become. I love each of you and consider it one of my greatest blessings to be a part of our family. May Heavenly Father bless each of you this coming year, and may we follow the counsel of a Quaker proverb, “Thee lift me and I’ll lift thee, and we’ll ascend together”.